“Will this make me uncomfortable?” is the common concern I thought about the most. It can be unsettling to really examine oneself. I try to hide my warts when in public; I know reactions and differing roles I am in force me to bite my tongue at times (it can get pretty bloody!). I have tried to keep personal experiences from affecting reactions at school, but at times it isn’t possible. Keeping quiet until I can be objective is a pretty good tool for me to use, that goes back to being the ‘peacemaker’ again.
The time it would take, especially given the fact that I have little experience with blogging, was my initial concern. In terms of discomfort, I think I'm in the Trust Quadrant to such an extent that I trust myself and trust others. If sharing and exploring helps me, it's a good thing. On the downside, trusting who you are may tie into the third concern, the ability to change. If you trust yourself and feel that you already are the person you want to be, the need to change may not seem as pressing. I agree with Jerrie that, because we want to be seen as good people, we often don't say what we are thinking when dealing with those that are more difficult. However, holding your tongue until you have perspective is likely a good trait most of the time. I compare it to "winning the battle, but losing the war." Saying what we think in harsh terms may get our immediate need met, but in the long-term, we may have to spend a great deal of time repairing the relationship and earning trust back.
My concern is I am so far in the "Pleaser" corner of the grid that it isn't even funny. I find myslef not liking conflict and when put into a situation including with my own family I try to keep my mouth shut and agree with everyone else to get along. I do and do for everyone else buy myself most of the time and when people have issues I try and find ways to make them happy and to make the situation go away vs attacking it head on. I am one to problem solve things but I find I do most of it in my head or as my husband says I dod a lot of talking to myself.
I am the same way! I don't like conflict and do anything to try and avoid it - especially when it comes to family. I have a lot of conversations in my head.
I am the same way! I don't like conflict and do anything to try and avoid it - especially when it comes to family. I have a lot of conversations in my head.
Hey Amy, there is nothing wrong with talking to yourself. I do it all the time. Sometimes I am the only one that will listen. Self talk often helps me plan and organize how I will handle a specific situation. I often "rehearse" in my mind how to handle a situation, especially if there is conflict involved. Sometimes it is also knowing when to keep quiet.......
"IF this works, why aren't we already doing it?" I often find that when I self-reflect I come with things that I need to change. Change is hard!!!! At times it comes down to, am I willing to change and do what it takes to change. For me I truly feel that you have to change with the times or get left behind. This can be very unsettling and you have to be willing to move out of your comfort zone. It jangles the nerves so to speak to be "out of the Box". But in the long run if you want to improve as a person, teacher, parent, boss or whatever there is going to be a period of time in which you just have to deal with the discomfort in order to get where you want to go.
In college we had to complete several self reflection activities/assignments. It made you really critique yourself and find ways to improve yourself. As I am thinking about it, it would be a good exercise to continue to complete this at least once or twice a year. It does take you out of your comfort zone, but that is a small price to pay to improve yourself.
Through the work I’ve been doing with KSDE and the NCATE standards on university accreditation, reflection is a key threaded throughout the entire teacher education program in most colleges. Marcy, self-reflection is what makes us all better at what we do, be it the words we rehearse or the actions we plan, it’s the revisiting them that leads to improvement. I lay away at night thinking about how to handle a situation or wishing I had done it differently, and I never thought about it being ‘reflection’ for improvement; I just thought my brain wouldn’t shut down. Doing new things or old things differently is sometimes scary, ‘what if I fail’ or what if I’m not good at it’ are always questions in the back of my mind. I do not want to cause harm to others and I do want to be successful. Marcy and Amy, some of my best conversations have been with myself, and yes, I do answer myself! I’m only a little nuts!!!
"If this works, why aren't we already doing it?" This really hit home for me. I think change is a very big thing for people and can be very hard as well. I really hate change, and find it hard to change. You get so comfortable in what you have always done it is hard to stop and evaluate things and change. As an educator I have noticed throughout my few years of teaching, teachers hate change. They want to keep doing what they have always been doing, because it is easier. Change is very hard for people.
Amy- I have the same concern myself I am a huge pleaser always have and probably always will. I know this and have identified this as being a problem in some situations, but I can't help it. It's hard to change, because that is how I see myself.
Marcy- I love your quote you have to change with the times or get left behind. That is so true. I have seen myself change in the work place, but in my personal life, I find it a bit more challenging.
Ashley, your comment of teachers not wanting to change is so typical of older teachers and teachers who are not secure. As an example, i was looking through my old jr. high stuff and came across worksheets that i had done as an 8th grade in a particular class and lo and behold, my daughter 20 something years later had the same worksheet to complete. How's that for not changing!!!
Jerrie and Alan, you are so right when you both said that sometimes we'd like to say something, but because we are held at a higher standard than others, we very much so can't say what we are feeling and thinking. sometimes my commander side comes out and i say something anyway which always gets me into some sort of trouble. Just depends on which battle is important.
We all have to change with the times, now more than ever with technology and those teachers who are not learning how to change are going to have kids that are far behind others' students.
As Marcy said, the purpose of self-reflection is to change what we're doing and change is hard. On the other hand, as Alan said, if we're satisfied with who we are and what we do, we won't be open to changing. I think that all of us who are doing this study are open to discovering things about ourselves that we can improve, otherwise why would we have chosen to do the study??? For me, I love change (as long as it isn't changing something about myself). I smiled to read Izilla's comment about her daughter doing the same worksheets she did 20 years ago. I know teachers like that; they follow the philosophy of if it works, why change?
The concerns of the time factor and why aren’t we all doing this, were legitimate, but my biggest concern was, “Will this make me uncomfortable?” As far as I’m concerned it’s okay for me to know I’m not perfect, but for others I’d like to hide that fact. It bothers me to know that everyone may know my flaws. Hopefully this is how I will grow into even a better person, so bear with me group.
Alan, I can sympathize with you on the blogging thing. I’ve never been on a blog or seen one and didn’t have a clue. Then when I tried getting on it didn’t work. Without Marcy and Ellen I was about to give up.
Marcy, you mentioned we have to change with the times or be left behind. Thank you for the encouragement. After a milestone birthday this past week it even hits home more- I don’t want to get old so I had better keep up.
"If this works, why aren't we already doing it?" I feel sometimes it's VERY hard for me to change-when I see it as I can't change that! It's easy to get into a routine and think "I can't change", but once I have a passion to make a change, I will do everything in my power to change-but you better watch out, cause I will want everyone else to do the same-especially when it comes to my job!
Amy-I talk to myself ALOT-it's how I work out problems, organize my thoughts and release frustration-I'm sure if someone would see me outside, in my car or in my sewing room, they probably would think I was nuts, because I talk to myself alot!
Linda-not all older teachers can't make changes. I consider myself an older teacher, but I enjoy learning and trying new strategies-when I see them as quality, then I can make the change more easily. I think it depends on the personality of the teacher and like you said-how secure they feel in themselves-and many times I have seen those teachers that have difficulty with change are ones that are insecure in what they do, and like to have things the way they have always been.
I am curious to find out how my early childhood conditioning shaped my power genes. There was never a power struggle in my family, what dad said was how it was. I am looking forward to reading Craddock’s true life examples to explain the different quadrants. The quadrant explanation (power grid) has been around along time. It reminds me of Covey’s organizational quadrants. I wonder if any of you remember the color quadrants. What color are you (Blue/blue, blue/orange, etc)? The quadrants provide an outline with boundaries so we can understand the different power genes. I don’t think we are ever in just one quadrant, our personal and professional lives are just not that structured, unless we are “Stepford” people. Wow if this book reveals so much about our power genes-our behavior and emotional responses-we can deal with difficult people, it will be worth reading.
"How much time will this take?" was my biggest concerns. There are often times I feel I am barely keeping my head above water now. The last thing I need is something else to weigh me down.
Marcy- I love your comment about having to change with the times or get left behind. I think it is so true, and one reason I enjoy working for HPEC is the organization is always willing to change to keep up with the times. (Even when it makes many staff members uncomfortable.)
Jerrie and Laura - You commented about wanting to keep your "warts" hidden and not wanting others to see your flaws. I think that is true for most people. Even when we see flaws within ourselves, sometimes it is easier to cover up the wart instead of working to remove the wart.
Initially, I thought the concern that most applied to me was “How Much Time Will This Take?” Like Jan mentioned, there are times when I feel like I’m just trying to keep my head above water, and I really don’t want to add anything else to my “To Do” list. However, after I thought about it, I realized that if I believe something’s really important, I’m going to make time for it and make it work. Then I figured out, “If This Works, Why Aren’t We Already Doing It?” is where I get hung up. In saying that though, I don’t want to give off the impression that I’m completely against change, because I don’t feel like I am. It just might take me awhile longer than others to jump on the bandwagon (which I’ll attribute to my parents ☺).
Amy~ I talk to myself too. Actually, I do it a LOT more than I realize. And instead of just “rehearsing” in my mind (like what Marcy mentioned), I’ll slip up and rehearse out loud sometimes! In fact, just yesterday, I was walking down the hall to the front office to meet a parent for a meeting. While walking, I was talking to myself (OUT LOUD!) because I was a little anxious and wanted to make sure I was comfortable with what I would be telling this parent. I didn’t think anything of it because it was during the middle of a class, everyone was in their offices/classrooms, and the halls were empty… Or so I thought. As I near the office, I see a student getting ready to use the hall phone, and looking at me like I’m crazy (And did I mention I talk with my hands a lot too??? So this probably just added to the effect, haha!). This was VERY funny to me because I don’t think very many of the students at this school completely understand what a school psychologist is or what one does, so I KNEW this one had to be thinking, “School psychologist… School psycho…” Haha! Even though I’m sure I looked absolutely ridiculous, I cracked up about this… AFTER I was back in my office and completely alone of course ☺
Jerrie and Laura~ I relate to the comment about wanting to keep warts hidden. However, I’ve also learned that you can only keep them hidden for so long. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s way easier to cover up flaws than to put them on display and then wonder how others will react. But at the same time, I also think it’s good to try to correct things sooner than later, before the situation becomes unmanageable (Shoutout to early interventions!). Easier said than done, right???
I also tend to talk to myself rehearsing what I'm going to say and self reflecting, often without even realizing that I am doing it. I have found myself in situations where others have heard me talking to myself and I also was embarrassed! I still continue to talk to myself because it helps me organize my thoughts and figure out my next steps sometimes.
I think the concern about how much time it takes applies to me. As a teacher I have little time for much outside of work. I am also a mother, wife and Wednesday night youth group teacher who drives an hour each way to work. That really makes my time precious.
Jerrie-- I agree that it can be very uncomfortable to examine ourselves. We may find favorable traits, but more often we find flaws or areas that need some improvement.
blhoryna-- I agree that if something is important, you will make time for it. You may not like that you have less time for something else, but it is imperative that we prioritize our lives and find ways to better ourselves, whether at work, home, or elsewhere.
I can totally relate to the "Will this make me uncomfortable?" Everyone wants to look professional and give the impression that we know what we are doing. I have never had a great desire to look like an idiot! Therefore, when something occurs, sometimes I will hold back because I don't want to sound like I do not know what I am doing. I like to take time and think about my responses before making them. Isn't it funny how hours later we tell ourselves, "I should have said this or I should have done that!"
However, once you observe someone who "speaks their mind" you know that it is better to bite your tongue like Jerrie and Alan said because you will be mending bridges for a long time! As a special education teacher, I always feels that I have to watch what I say because if I make another teacher/administrator upset, I hurt my students in the long run.
Jerrie, I so agree with you! I have laid awake thinking about things and how I should have done something differently. As you said, I never thought about it as reflection. However, now that it was mentioned I can see how it will help me out in the future. There have been times I am laying in bed and think about things I did years ago that I wish I could have done differently.
I also talk to myself. Sometimes I will stand in front of the mirror and practice what I need to say to someone. I try to get the basics down and not practice too much. When I speak, I want it to seem real and not "canned"!
Izilla I loved your "worksheet" example. I notice that the people who are always complaining about change are usually the most "challenging" teachers in the building! I also agree with your comment about the teachers who are insecure do not want change. I think that some teachers do not want to put in the time and work necessary if they were to change what they were doing; as a result, they do the same worksheets year after 20 years!!
So I tried this last Friday and then again on Saturday. My post was the concern of "How much time is this going to take..." - and then after struggling w/ logging on at home two times (and trying to figure out what I was doing wrong)....'nuff said. Alan: I've never blogged before so that was a concern (the time to learn someting new); then it seemed relatively simple until Friday evening... (wonder if my firewall blocked ?). But, I want to improve my teaching and leadership skills so figured - why not? blhoryna: I can relate to the feeling of "barely keeping my head above water"..... I am enjoying the book and hope the posting will get a little smoother.
I agree with the others that my initial concern was How Much Time Will This Take. With three little ones at home I try not to load my plate too full. After thinking about it it really wasn't about the time. It became will this make me uncomfortable? Some of you who know me might not realize this, but confrontation makes me sick to my stomach. I have adapted through the years to be able to get through the confrontations I need to, to do the best for my students. I still don't like them. I don't think anyone likes to feel that they are being taken out of their comfort zone. To be a better you, sometimes it takes feeling a little uncomfortable and taking a look inside.
Amy and Marcy, it's not talking to yourself, it's thinking out loud. A few years ago I shared a classroom with another sped teacher. Our computers were right next to each other. She quickly learned that I wasn't talking to her I was thinking out loud. She got so good at ignoring me, that I had to say her name when I was talking to her. Thank goodness we became fast friends.
Karen, my first blog experience was last year with one of the book studies. I think I had to post four different times before it finally went through. Hang in there, it gets easier.
For me, it is the time issue. Changing how you function under stressful situations is going against how you were raised, and therefore will take a long time and a lot of practice to reverse the defects in ones upbringing or childhood. Although it will make you a better person, it will take work and time.
Jjneat - I don't know if teachers who don't want change are necessarily insecure. Although this may be the case for some, I think it is just that we are creatures of habit and when you have been teaching or living the same way for 30 years (because it does work that way and you are fine with it), it takes too much work and stress to change. Amy & Marcy - I think everyone does that, and I think it makes your argument better. You allow yourself the time to compose your thoughts, think of different angles within the situation, and even stop yourself before saying something you shouldn't!
My initial concern was making sure I would not miss a deadline. There are so many things going on between work, home, and getting my masters I am afraid I will not get post in on time. This is my first blog and so far I have really enjoyed it.
Heidi I agree that while it may take time everyone is capable of changing.
LeNnis like you I think it is important to see how I fit in according to this book. I really have never given it much thought before this and it will be interesting if it changes me or helps me to adapt to different situations.
Wow! This applies to me and I think to all of us. It seems that we let our plates get so full that one more thing won't fit. The amount of time it might take to do an evaluation and then follow through with what the results show to improve ones self seem rather time consuming. However, I do like what the text has to say about the amount of time the Power Grid evaluation will take. It states that due to the time we already devote to our professional and personal lives it won't seem to take much time. The framework, once in place, will simply strengthen our power base at work and I hope at home too!
OK, I'm sure I had something remarkably insightful to say in the first response I wrote to this one, about being introspective by nature, but no so sure I wanted to share that with everyone. What my concern should have been, is will this work, since I didn't discover to my 3rd post that you have to scroll on down after you push publish and type in the letters :) What's that about live and learn. Here I'd always thought I was pretty good with technology.
How much time will this take? When beginning this blog, my main concern was the time constraints and always meeting the deadlines. While going through the blog, I thought I did a good job of it, but somehow I completely missed this post! I cant believe I did that! Oh well, you live and learn. Time was a factor for me because I already felt like I was pretty busy before starting the blog, but like others have mentioned, you can always make time to improve yourself.
“Will this make me uncomfortable?” is the common concern I thought about the most. It can be unsettling to really examine oneself. I try to hide my warts when in public; I know reactions and differing roles I am in force me to bite my tongue at times (it can get pretty bloody!). I have tried to keep personal experiences from affecting reactions at school, but at times it isn’t possible. Keeping quiet until I can be objective is a pretty good tool for me to use, that goes back to being the ‘peacemaker’ again.
ReplyDeleteThe time it would take, especially given the fact that I have little experience with blogging, was my initial concern. In terms of discomfort, I think I'm in the Trust Quadrant to such an extent that I trust myself and trust others. If sharing and exploring helps me, it's a good thing. On the downside, trusting who you are may tie into the third concern, the ability to change. If you trust yourself and feel that you already are the person you want to be, the need to change may not seem as pressing. I agree with Jerrie that, because we want to be seen as good people, we often don't say what we are thinking when dealing with those that are more difficult. However, holding your tongue until you have perspective is likely a good trait most of the time. I compare it to "winning the battle, but losing the war." Saying what we think in harsh terms may get our immediate need met, but in the long-term, we may have to spend a great deal of time repairing the relationship and earning trust back.
ReplyDeleteMy concern is I am so far in the "Pleaser" corner of the grid that it isn't even funny. I find myslef not liking conflict and when put into a situation including with my own family I try to keep my mouth shut and agree with everyone else to get along. I do and do for everyone else buy myself most of the time and when people have issues I try and find ways to
ReplyDeletemake them happy and to make the situation go away vs attacking it head on. I am one to problem solve things but I find I do most of it in my head or as my husband says I dod a lot of talking to myself.
I am the same way! I don't like conflict and do anything to try and avoid it - especially when it comes to family. I have a lot of conversations in my head.
DeleteI am the same way! I don't like conflict and do anything to try and avoid it - especially when it comes to family. I have a lot of conversations in my head.
DeleteHey Amy, there is nothing wrong with talking to yourself. I do it all the time. Sometimes I am the only one that will listen. Self talk often helps me plan and organize how I will handle a specific situation. I often "rehearse" in my mind how to handle a situation, especially if there is conflict involved. Sometimes it is also knowing when to keep quiet.......
ReplyDelete"IF this works, why aren't we already doing it?" I often find that when I self-reflect I come with things that I need to change. Change is hard!!!! At times it comes down to, am I willing to change and do what it takes to change. For me I truly feel that you have to change with the times or get left behind. This can be very unsettling and you have to be willing to move out of your comfort zone. It jangles the nerves so to speak to be "out of the Box". But in the long run if you want to improve as a person, teacher, parent, boss or whatever there is going to be a period of time in which you just have to deal with the discomfort in order to get where you want to go.
ReplyDeleteIn college we had to complete several self reflection activities/assignments. It made you really critique yourself and find ways to improve yourself. As I am thinking about it, it would be a good exercise to continue to complete this at least once or twice a year. It does take you out of your comfort zone, but that is a small price to pay to improve yourself.
DeleteThrough the work I’ve been doing with KSDE and the NCATE standards on university accreditation, reflection is a key threaded throughout the entire teacher education program in most colleges. Marcy, self-reflection is what makes us all better at what we do, be it the words we rehearse or the actions we plan, it’s the revisiting them that leads to improvement. I lay away at night thinking about how to handle a situation or wishing I had done it differently, and I never thought about it being ‘reflection’ for improvement; I just thought my brain wouldn’t shut down.
ReplyDeleteDoing new things or old things differently is sometimes scary, ‘what if I fail’ or what if I’m not good at it’ are always questions in the back of my mind. I do not want to cause harm to others and I do want to be successful.
Marcy and Amy, some of my best conversations have been with myself, and yes, I do answer myself! I’m only a little nuts!!!
"If this works, why aren't we already doing it?" This really hit home for me. I think change is a very big thing for people and can be very hard as well. I really hate change, and find it hard to change. You get so comfortable in what you have always done it is hard to stop and evaluate things and change. As an educator I have noticed throughout my few years of teaching, teachers hate change. They want to keep doing what they have always been doing, because it is easier. Change is very hard for people.
ReplyDeleteAmy- I have the same concern myself I am a huge pleaser always have and probably always will. I know this and have identified this as being a problem in some situations, but I can't help it. It's hard to change, because that is how I see myself.
Marcy- I love your quote you have to change with the times or get left behind. That is so true. I have seen myself change in the work place, but in my personal life, I find it a bit more challenging.
Ashley, your comment of teachers not wanting to change is so typical of older teachers and teachers who are not secure. As an example, i was looking through my old jr. high stuff and came across worksheets that i had done as an 8th grade in a particular class and lo and behold, my daughter 20 something years later had the same worksheet to complete. How's that for not changing!!!
ReplyDeleteJerrie and Alan, you are so right when you both said that sometimes we'd like to say something, but because we are held at a higher standard than others, we very much so can't say what we are feeling and thinking. sometimes my commander side comes out and i say something anyway which always gets me into some sort of trouble. Just depends on which battle is important.
We all have to change with the times, now more than ever with technology and those teachers who are not learning how to change are going to have kids that are far behind others' students.
As Marcy said, the purpose of self-reflection is to change what we're doing and change is hard. On the other hand, as Alan said, if we're satisfied with who we are and what we do, we won't be open to changing. I think that all of us who are doing this study are open to discovering things about ourselves that we can improve, otherwise why would we have chosen to do the study??? For me, I love change (as long as it isn't changing something about myself). I smiled to read Izilla's comment about her daughter doing the same worksheets she did 20 years ago. I know teachers like that; they follow the philosophy of if it works, why change?
ReplyDeleteThe concerns of the time factor and why aren’t we all doing this, were legitimate, but my biggest concern was, “Will this make me uncomfortable?” As far as I’m concerned it’s okay for me to know I’m not perfect, but for others I’d like to hide that fact. It bothers me to know that everyone may know my flaws. Hopefully this is how I will grow into even a better person, so bear with me group.
ReplyDeleteAlan, I can sympathize with you on the blogging thing. I’ve never been on a blog or seen one and didn’t have a clue. Then when I tried getting on it didn’t work. Without Marcy and Ellen I was about to give up.
Marcy, you mentioned we have to change with the times or be left behind. Thank you for the encouragement. After a milestone birthday this past week it even hits home more- I don’t want to get old so I had better keep up.
"If this works, why aren't we already doing it?" I feel sometimes it's VERY hard for me to change-when I see it as I can't change that! It's easy to get into a routine and think "I can't change", but once I have a passion to make a change, I will do everything in my power to change-but you better watch out, cause I will want everyone else to do the same-especially when it comes to my job!
ReplyDeleteAmy-I talk to myself ALOT-it's how I work out problems, organize my thoughts and release frustration-I'm sure if someone would see me outside, in my car or in my sewing room, they probably would think I was nuts, because I talk to myself alot!
Linda-not all older teachers can't make changes. I consider myself an older teacher, but I enjoy learning and trying new strategies-when I see them as quality, then I can make the change more easily. I think it depends on the personality of the teacher and like you said-how secure they feel in themselves-and many times I have seen those teachers that have difficulty with change are ones that are insecure in what they do, and like to have things the way they have always been.
I am curious to find out how my early childhood conditioning shaped my power genes. There was never a power struggle in my family, what dad said was how it was. I am looking forward to reading Craddock’s true life examples to explain the different quadrants.
ReplyDeleteThe quadrant explanation (power grid) has been around along time. It reminds me of Covey’s organizational quadrants. I wonder if any of you remember the color quadrants. What color are you (Blue/blue, blue/orange, etc)? The quadrants provide an outline with boundaries so we can understand the different power genes. I don’t think we are ever in just one quadrant, our personal and professional lives are just not that structured, unless we are “Stepford” people.
Wow if this book reveals so much about our power genes-our behavior and emotional responses-we can deal with difficult people, it will be worth reading.
I agree that no one is solely in one quadrant. I hope that the book does reveal a lot with regards to our power-genes too!
DeleteI agree that no one is solely in one quadrant. I hope that the book does reveal a lot with regards to our power-genes too!
Delete"How much time will this take?" was my biggest concerns. There are often times I feel I am barely keeping my head above water now. The last thing I need is something else to weigh me down.
ReplyDeleteMarcy- I love your comment about having to change with the times or get left behind. I think it is so true, and one reason I enjoy working for HPEC is the organization is always willing to change to keep up with the times. (Even when it makes many staff members uncomfortable.)
Jerrie and Laura - You commented about wanting to keep your "warts" hidden and not wanting others to see your flaws. I think that is true for most people. Even when we see flaws within ourselves, sometimes it is easier to cover up the wart instead of working to remove the wart.
Initially, I thought the concern that most applied to me was “How Much Time Will This Take?” Like Jan mentioned, there are times when I feel like I’m just trying to keep my head above water, and I really don’t want to add anything else to my “To Do” list. However, after I thought about it, I realized that if I believe something’s really important, I’m going to make time for it and make it work. Then I figured out, “If This Works, Why Aren’t We Already Doing It?” is where I get hung up. In saying that though, I don’t want to give off the impression that I’m completely against change, because I don’t feel like I am. It just might take me awhile longer than others to jump on the bandwagon (which I’ll attribute to my parents ☺).
ReplyDeleteAmy~
I talk to myself too. Actually, I do it a LOT more than I realize. And instead of just “rehearsing” in my mind (like what Marcy mentioned), I’ll slip up and rehearse out loud sometimes! In fact, just yesterday, I was walking down the hall to the front office to meet a parent for a meeting. While walking, I was talking to myself (OUT LOUD!) because I was a little anxious and wanted to make sure I was comfortable with what I would be telling this parent. I didn’t think anything of it because it was during the middle of a class, everyone was in their offices/classrooms, and the halls were empty… Or so I thought. As I near the office, I see a student getting ready to use the hall phone, and looking at me like I’m crazy (And did I mention I talk with my hands a lot too??? So this probably just added to the effect, haha!). This was VERY funny to me because I don’t think very many of the students at this school completely understand what a school psychologist is or what one does, so I KNEW this one had to be thinking, “School psychologist… School psycho…” Haha! Even though I’m sure I looked absolutely ridiculous, I cracked up about this… AFTER I was back in my office and completely alone of course ☺
Jerrie and Laura~
I relate to the comment about wanting to keep warts hidden. However, I’ve also learned that you can only keep them hidden for so long. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s way easier to cover up flaws than to put them on display and then wonder how others will react. But at the same time, I also think it’s good to try to correct things sooner than later, before the situation becomes unmanageable (Shoutout to early interventions!). Easier said than done, right???
I also tend to talk to myself rehearsing what I'm going to say and self reflecting, often without even realizing that I am doing it. I have found myself in situations where others have heard me talking to myself and I also was embarrassed! I still continue to talk to myself because it helps me organize my thoughts and figure out my next steps sometimes.
DeleteI think the concern about how much time it takes applies to me. As a teacher I have little time for much outside of work. I am also a mother, wife and Wednesday night youth group teacher who drives an hour each way to work. That really makes my time precious.
ReplyDeleteJerrie-- I agree that it can be very uncomfortable to examine ourselves. We may find favorable traits, but more often we find flaws or areas that need some improvement.
blhoryna-- I agree that if something is important, you will make time for it. You may not like that you have less time for something else, but it is imperative that we prioritize our lives and find ways to better ourselves, whether at work, home, or elsewhere.
I can totally relate to the "Will this make me uncomfortable?" Everyone wants to look professional and give the impression that we know what we are doing. I have never had a great desire to look like an idiot! Therefore, when something occurs, sometimes I will hold back because I don't want to sound like I do not know what I am doing. I like to take time and think about my responses before making them. Isn't it funny how hours later we tell ourselves, "I should have said this or I should have done that!"
ReplyDeleteHowever, once you observe someone who "speaks their mind" you know that it is better to bite your tongue like Jerrie and Alan said because you will be mending bridges for a long time! As a special education teacher, I always feels that I have to watch what I say because if I make another teacher/administrator upset, I hurt my students in the long run.
Jerrie, I so agree with you! I have laid awake thinking about things and how I should have done something differently. As you said, I never thought about it as reflection. However, now that it was mentioned I can see how it will help me out in the future. There have been times I am laying in bed and think about things I did years ago that I wish I could have done differently.
I also talk to myself. Sometimes I will stand in front of the mirror and practice what I need to say to someone. I try to get the basics down and not practice too much. When I speak, I want it to seem real and not "canned"!
Izilla I loved your "worksheet" example. I notice that the people who are always complaining about change are usually the most "challenging" teachers in the building! I also agree with your comment about the teachers who are insecure do not want change. I think that some teachers do not want to put in the time and work necessary if they were to change what they were doing; as a result, they do the same worksheets year after 20 years!!
testing....
ReplyDeleteSo I tried this last Friday and then again on Saturday. My post was the concern of "How much time is this going to take..." - and then after struggling w/ logging on at home two times (and trying to figure out what I was doing wrong)....'nuff said.
ReplyDeleteAlan: I've never blogged before so that was a concern (the time to learn someting new); then it seemed relatively simple until Friday evening... (wonder if my firewall blocked ?). But, I want to improve my teaching and leadership skills so figured - why not?
blhoryna: I can relate to the feeling of "barely keeping my head above water"..... I am enjoying the book and hope the posting will get a little smoother.
I agree with the others that my initial concern was How Much Time Will This Take. With three little ones at home I try not to load my plate too full. After thinking about it it really wasn't about the time. It became will this make me uncomfortable? Some of you who know me might not realize this, but confrontation makes me sick to my stomach. I have adapted through the years to be able to get through the confrontations I need to, to do the best for my students. I still don't like them. I don't think anyone likes to feel that they are being taken out of their comfort zone. To be a better you, sometimes it takes feeling a little uncomfortable and taking a look inside.
ReplyDeleteAmy and Marcy, it's not talking to yourself, it's thinking out loud. A few years ago I shared a classroom with another sped teacher. Our computers were right next to each other. She quickly learned that I wasn't talking to her I was thinking out loud. She got so good at ignoring me, that I had to say her name when I was talking to her. Thank goodness we became fast friends.
Karen, my first blog experience was last year with one of the book studies. I think I had to post four different times before it finally went through. Hang in there, it gets easier.
ReplyDeleteFor me, it is the time issue. Changing how you function under stressful situations is going against how you were raised, and therefore will take a long time and a lot of practice to reverse the defects in ones upbringing or childhood. Although it will make you a better person, it will take work and time.
ReplyDeleteJjneat - I don't know if teachers who don't want change are necessarily insecure. Although this may be the case for some, I think it is just that we are creatures of habit and when you have been teaching or living the same way for 30 years (because it does work that way and you are fine with it), it takes too much work and stress to change.
ReplyDeleteAmy & Marcy - I think everyone does that, and I think it makes your argument better. You allow yourself the time to compose your thoughts, think of different angles within the situation, and even stop yourself before saying something you shouldn't!
My initial concern was making sure I would not miss a deadline. There are so many things going on between work, home, and getting my masters I am afraid I will not get post in on time. This is my first blog and so far I have really enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteHeidi I agree that while it may take time everyone is capable of changing.
ReplyDeleteLeNnis like you I think it is important to see how I fit in according to this book. I really have never given it much thought before this and it will be interesting if it changes me or helps me to adapt to different situations.
"How Much Time Will This Take?"
ReplyDeleteWow! This applies to me and I think to all of us. It seems that we let our plates get so full that one more thing won't fit. The amount of time it might take to do an evaluation and then follow through with what the results show to improve ones self seem rather time consuming. However, I do like what the text has to say about the amount of time the Power Grid evaluation will take. It states that due to the time we already devote to our professional and personal lives it won't seem to take much time. The framework, once in place, will simply strengthen our power base at work and I hope at home too!
OK, I'm sure I had something remarkably insightful to say in the first response I wrote to this one, about being introspective by nature, but no so sure I wanted to share that with everyone. What my concern should have been, is will this work, since I didn't discover to my 3rd post that you have to scroll on down after you push publish and type in the letters :) What's that about live and learn. Here I'd always thought I was pretty good with technology.
ReplyDeleteHow much time will this take? When beginning this blog, my main concern was the time constraints and always meeting the deadlines. While going through the blog, I thought I did a good job of it, but somehow I completely missed this post! I cant believe I did that! Oh well, you live and learn. Time was a factor for me because I already felt like I was pretty busy before starting the blog, but like others have mentioned, you can always make time to improve yourself.
ReplyDelete